Mansoor Ali Khan’s Insincere Apology & Trisha’s Acceptance : Why Do Women Settle For The Bare Minimum?

The Gendered Lens of Society!

: Why are women ready to compromise with the bare minimum?

The recent series of events surrounding Trisha and Mansoor Ali Khan was the talk of the movie industry. When a video of Mansoor Ali Khan started doing the rounds on social media, his sexist and derogatory remarks about the actress came to light. In reciprocation, Trisha put out a tweet condemning his comments and requested action to be taken against the actor. Many celebrities from the industry came in support of her and publicly put out statements standing in favor of her. In reaction to this, he gave out another interview where he refused to apologize. But when the National Commission of Women took action against the complaint, he put out a half-hearted apology to Trisha. She gracefully accepted the apology and put out a message on her social media account saying, “To err is human, to forgive is divine.”

When Trisha stood up for herself and openly criticized his actions, it was a brave act. When many actors and filmmakers came in support of her, we saw solidarity. But in all of this, Mansoor Ali Khan ended up getting more screen time and publicity than needed. Why is it that when one man makes a grave mistake, we tend to forgive him the first chance he shows some remorse? SHouldn’t acts like this be punishable so that it isn’t repeated? The comments he made in the first video were atrocious, he expressed a desire to film an intimate scene with Trisha in the latest film, Leo, and how he was disappointed that he didn’t get to do it. He goes on to say that he has filmed various ‘ rape ‘ scenes with Kushboo and Roja in his earlier films. A statement like this is demeaning to all women, in fact, it enrages us to even see it be published and shared.

The hypocrisy is that when a man makes a statement like this, which implies that he wishes to get close to her and force himself on her, even though he justifies it by saying it’s just a ‘scene’ in a movie, he gets away with it. Just a small inquiry where he is given the benefit of the doubt and an insincere apology is what it takes to get out of this unscathed. Take Chinmayi’s issue for instance where she got banned from the industry for speaking her truth about getting molested by an award-winning lyricist. When she spoke about what she suffered and how the accused was a serial offender, she faced shame and boycott. Why are the rules for men and women different? Shouldn’t a man be held responsible for his actions? Well, it doesn’t seem like it in our ‘world’.

A recent Chennai pun incident comes to mind where the TV channels focussed on shaming women instead of reporting an incident that involved the breaking of curfew by the pub. How the narratives are twisted to question the morality of women, and how a story is built to shame a woman while men are given a free pass should be questioned. YOu can see the cameras specifically targeting the women at the venue and how the men are shown as mere collaterals. It’s 2023 and even today, this is the state of affairs in our country. Everyone is so quick to judge and shame women when men have been getting away with the same thing for generations. If smoking is harmful to health, it applies to both genders. But the story becomes about how a woman was found smoking and how she brings shame to society while 5 other men surrounding her indulge in the same act. The double standards are notorious.

A popular talk show in Bollywood called Koffee with Karan’s first episode had Ranveer Singh and Deepika Padukone as guests. The conversation was about how they started to date and Deepika candidly said that she casually met other men as they were not in a serious relationship. This quote was blown out of proportion and she was called ‘ characterless’ and of loose morals. She was honest and real and she had to face repercussions of her statements just because people aren’t ready to accept progressive thinking. When a man gets to go around with multiple women at a time, he is termed a stud but when a woman wants to find a partner after meeting up with a few men, she is called names. The unfair and unequal treatment given to women is the root cause of all problems.

In conclusion, whether it is the Mansoor-Trisha incident or the Chennai pub controversy, all in question need to be held responsible for their actions. We have to set a better example for the generations to come, we have to build a safer world for the young girls and boys who are raised with a progressive mindset.


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