“He violated my trust.”
Recounting the experience over and over again is almost forced upon most of the survivors. Chinmayi is hopeful that if the story is repeated, more would listen. “What happened was a man I held with utmost respect, a man I deeply trusted, somewhat of a father figure to me, violated that trust. He has disrespected me by invading my privacy and safe zone. I could not work with him anymore. It had come to a point where I had told my peers and colleagues that I do not want to be in the same room as him. I am uncomfortable around this person.”
“We are conditioned not to talk.”
Ask her why now, and Chinmayi says:
“To all the men out there, go back home and ask your loved ones if they have ever experienced any incident of abuse or harassment. The answer would be yes. When you wonder why they haven’t told you about it for so long, understand that women are conditioned to stay silent from their childhood on this topic. There are more repercussions to speaking about it than not. Family dishonour, questions on behaviour and more reasons are cited by close circuit people to silence those who want to open up. So both men and women stay silent about what happened to them. Everybody’s had someone go through it, or in the least, they know someone who has gone through it. Why didn’t they speak out before? It is because we wait for the time society is deemed receptive to it. We speak when we feel we would be heard and not just asked to stay silent and go back. Society is still split about it. I don’t blame society for asking me why now. I did tell people I know but I could not keep quiet any longer. I thought it was time people would hear me so I came out with it now.”
