Everything fell apart gradually. I lost my concentration in academics, I didn’t make a single friend back there. I used to walk miles and come back walking. I still didn’t ask my dad for money but there were times when he would send them to me as much as he could. I used to immediately go get some fruits and vegetables to add in some nutrients. However, I never gained weight and never felt like waking up. I didn’t talk to my parents on a video call. However, my dad visited me once and broke down into tears on seeing nothing but just my facial expressions – which was basically numb.

I do not remember the exact day when it all started but it was darker than hell would ever be. I cried a lot and I was so silent at times that I opened my mouth to just take in some air. Everything went out of proportion for no reason and I tried to end my life because I didn’t have a purpose to live anymore. I didn’t do it and honestly, I cannot also give you a reason why I didn’t – I just decided to sleep on it. It was that phasein my life where I loved lonliness than myself.

Fortunately for me, I had an understanding boyfriend, friends and parents who continuously struggled to help me through it. I still didn’t want to believe that I had depression until I went for a session with a psychologist. Clinical depression is real, folks. It need not have a reason like mine to trigger in. It just magically appears, talks to you and finally rules you. Social stigma regarding depression and anxiety must go away and for that to happen the people who love us must emotionally understand what we are going through.

Remember to always be open up about what you feel because that really helps. Talk, take help and finally, fight depression because there is nothing you can’t!