There is nothing sweeter than true friendship but then there is nothing sourer than a relationship with the wrong ones. Is your craving for companionship making you turn a blind eye to the faults of your so called mates? Here are six types you are better off without.
She is the free advice dispenser. From fixing a broken gadget to mending a broken heart, she has instant solutions for everything under the blessed Sun. Her readiness to resolve matters though welcome at times may be largely jarring on the nerves because a friend in this category is always on the lookout for problems when there are none.
Probably, a repressed childhood, a sheltered upbringing and a set of domineering parents have stifled her natural instincts. Now as an adult she is the victim of an uncontrollable need to ‘fix’ others’ lives. She is overly critical of all and sundry just like her relations had been of her. She finds it impossible to accept that others can accept responsibility for their own lives and actions.
She reverses the adage giving is better than receiving on its head. And money is not the only think she borrows. Your favourite thriller, your comic book collection, a bowl of sugar, your LBD, your range of imported cosmetics: nothing is safe from this sponge. Once things vanish into the black hole of her apartment they are not likely to see the light of the day again.
Strange as it may seem to us, some people are addicted to borrowing and get quite a kick from their compulsion for debt. In cases such as these, it is the lender who has to be assertive and mouth an emphatic no. The conflict between being kind and being exploited is a moral dilemma most of us face but a firm stance has to be taken against such compulsive borrowers for the sake of our peace of mind.
She may easily have been the originator of the expression ‘down in the dumps’. A proverbial wet blanket, she has probably never heard of the word ‘optimism’. Any plans your bunch of buds makes will elicit groans and grunts from this perpetual moaner. Headaches, backaches, pollution, global warming: something is always wrong with her or around her.
Women by nature are more sensitive than men and crave emotional dependence. Sometimes, insecurities about their personal and professional lives compel some women to bicker and nag. Instead of identifying the source of their discontent and seeking to better the situation, they find solace in self pity and whining.
Backbiting is her passion and divulging your secrets as soon as you confide in her is her hobby. She takes pleasure in tweeting, posting and mailing your intimate details to the world. She not only spills your secrets, she exaggerates and makes stuff up to spice up the proceedings.
It is actually quite difficult to understand what perverse pleasure some people get from sharing their friends’ confidences with the world. It could stem from a psychological urge to create a sensation even if it is at the expense of others. It is best to be wary of such people and not let any cat out of the bag in their presence as there is always an imminent danger that the cat may transform into a tiger behind our backs and come back to prey on us.
Whatever you have she aspires to have one better. The moment you book an Alpine holiday, she goes and reserves an exclusive chalet in Switzerland. The minute you buy a Versace gown, she will indulge in a Prada dress. For every LV clutch you own, she has a Hermes equivalent. It is almost like watching your reflection in the mirror, albeit a snobbish and slightly pompous one.
This set of ladies is more irritable than harmful. And the best part is that most of these one-uppers are not even aware that they are doing something very annoying. There is not much we can do about their behavioural pattern except maybe give them a dose of their own medicine by bragging about some weird and outlandish things we may have done (in our dreams). Ultimately, it may lead them to realize that they have to put a full stop somewhere or risk losing their sanity.
Inflicted with the classic frog in the well syndrome, this self absorbed lady would put Narcissus to shame. She is identified by her affinity for the words, ‘I, me, myself’. Her conversations are only about ‘my family’, ‘my clothes, ‘my job’. One hour in her company and you would even know which brand of toothpaste her kids use to shine their pearlies.
Normally, we feel only women talk about themselves but it is a guy thing too. The subjects of men’s conversation may be different, ranging from gadgets and gizmos to the latest set of wheels they purchased, but once they start a monologue it is difficult to contain them. It may just be a ploy to grab eyeballs and keep the spotlight fixed on them but these ladies and gentlemen have to be made to realise that the Earth does not revolve around them and that if they keep up this trait they may soon be talking about themselves to themselves.